There We Are Then

I really do have to stay off the Interwebz — it’s not good for my state of mind.

I was going to write something about self-esteem vs self-respect and jingoism vs patriotism, but time spent investigating some apps has irritated my first world spleen and now I’m in a bad mood.

When you read some people’s reviews, their sense of entitlement is really quite shocking.

That and their …

I was going to say reading comprehension skills, but it’s more than abundantly clear that they don’t have reading comprehension skills … when they bother to read at all that is … but simply plain, old comprehension skills.

And there are far too many of them.

If I’d known, yesterday, when I was contemplating writing Simpson, what I was going to see today, I’d’ve soiled myself in fright at the revelation of my paranormal powers — I don’t believe in paranormal powers … which is understandable … because they don’t exist … but even I have to wonder at my prescience now.

I need to find someone who knows how to hack Google’s Play Store and then develop an app that lets me reply to other’s app reviews … like I were the apps’ developer … leaving the response “There We Are Then”. ¹

On the plus side, now I come to think about what I was planning on writing, I was only going to write some vapid nonsense anyway.

In fact, I’m considering jacking it all in — I’m not sure I have anything of any worth to say anyhow … about anything … and it might be a good idea to close this account altogether … do something more productive with my time (like picking lint from my navel).

So, it might turn out to have an up-side after all.

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¹ For those of you aren’t native English speakers ² the word ‘twat’, when used as a description of someone is really very insultingly dismissive.

² No, if you’re not British, you’re not a native English speaker — you don’t actually speak English at all, but some bastard creole abomination. ³

³ You have a funny accent as well. ⁴

⁴ Your ears are too big too — there … I said it.