Quote. Of. The. DAY!

“Show us yer pearl.”

Followed by uproarious laughter, as it dawned on me just how filthy it had sounded — like the kind of lecherous character of whom even Jack Sparrow would disapprove.

Seriously, the filthiest thing I have ever heard anyone say¹ — I may not have a filthy laugh, but some of the things that come out of my mouth are not altogether infrequently disturbing³.

—
¹ Think Sid James without the wholesome aspect².

² Exactly!

³ Like the time I light-heartedly threatened to “break both your f**king legs. Where’s … my ... f**king … money!?”