QotD

(A Roundup of Found Pieces ¹ )

‎‎‎

‎

That was so incoherent that I’m not sure I understand what you’re trying to say any better than you do yourself … but it sounded like rubbish to me.

That’s not actually an admission of guilt, is it?

In fact, it’s a bit weaselly — the kind of response that might appeal to the Heil-reading, Brexit-voting pub-philosopher who stands to reason, innit … but that, upon examination with the aid of two or more braincells, reveals itself to be not simply no more than a filibusteringly long-winded restatement of the question but, furthermore, of a question nobody asked in the first place.

Have you considered going into politics?

Or PR?

Looking for sympathy?

It’s in the dictionary … between ‘shit’ and ‘syphilis’.

Them: “I’m no expert but […]”

Me: “Well, fuck off with your uninformed opinion then!”

Don’t you have a witch-burning to go to?

‎

—
¹ No, you lefthanded freak … I don’t know where, when or to whom I said them — that’s why they’re found pieces.

‎