Oh, dear … people can be very literal minded, it seems — Poe’s Law rules, O.K.

Remember, kids …

(No, really, you need to actually click on the link above and read the post behind it, not just look at the image ‘thumbnail’ and keep going ¹ )

I’m not suggesting we eliminate those on the Autistic Spectrum (including those who were formerly Aspergic) from the genepool. I’ve known a not altogether inconsiderable number of very lovely people who are and count one or two of them amongst my best friends. And I do kinda fancy Saga Norén more than I do Sofia Helin herself, so …

But there’s a limit to how many smilies and emojis I think I should be obliged to include in my writing, you know.

Literature, great or otherwise, doesn’t come with emoticons. When you watch a performance of A Comedy Of Errors, or listen to an audiobook version of a novel, you don’t get a laughter-track. If you want to read a book and it has words, turns of phrase and idioms in it that you don’t understand, you can’t complain to the author/publisher about the lack of spoonfeeding … you get a dictionary and look them up.

So, I dunno … maybe some people shouldn’t engage with others in writing and there should be a licence requirement to use the Interwebz or something — a minimum level of reading comprehension skills </just a thought>.

Whilst we’re here though … do you notice a similarity between this

By the time I got home, Grandmother had eaten most of the porcupines

… and this?

© Me, 2020–08–06–02–40–09

He does look guilty, doesn’t he? Caught in the act, you might say.

It’s the kind of expression you imagine crossing Stephen M. Tomic’s face multiple times a day — as well it no doubt might ⁴.

¹ I’ll come around and scroll your browser for you as well, shall I? ²

² Note: there’s a difference between sarcasm and withering scorn — guess which one I specialise in ³.

³ I dare you!

⁴ What a shame he’s not Canadian (that’d be even more fun).

There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live and too rare to die.