Okay, Aura …

Five annoying favours you should have said 'F**k, no' to

Reading a novel/screenplay

Unless you’re mates with Martin Amis or Joss Whedon, any creative work by a chum is guaranteed to be derivative crap with disturbing dragon sex scenes [my emphasis]. Putting off giving feedback indefinitely is impossible, so move to another country and assume a new identity.

Explain, please.