Motivational Aphorisms

The New Zealand Tourist Board has been running a Do Something New campaign, telling people to stop traveling “under the social influence,” stop copying everyone else and “share something new” … because all those photos posted to IG, FB and wherever (most especially by so-called ‘influencers’) are boring.

You know the ones: the photos you copied off the web, photoshopped yourself into and posted to your account to convince everyone you went to New Zealand instead of spending a fortnight greased up with lard under the cooker/hob/stove light in your parents’ kitchen:


The NZTB is absolutely right:

“Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that ̶t̶a̶k̶e̶ ̶o̶u̶r̶ ̶b̶r̶e̶a̶t̶h̶ ̶a̶w̶a̶y̶ fill our underwear with terror.” — ̶M̶a̶y̶a̶ ̶A̶n̶g̶e̶l̶o̶u̶ Me

Life’s too short — go skydiving instead … and see what you think of that view.

There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live and too rare to die.