Just Say “NO!”

I teleported home one night
With Ron and Sid and Meg.
Ron stole Meggie’s heart away
And I got Sidney’s leg.

— Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe

Quite apart from the above … and, of course, Brundle’s misadventures … there is a very definite argument against the introduction of teleportation that trumps all others, in my opinion.

Teleportation is the ultimate tool of the oppressor.

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All other forms of transport will be outlawed. You will only be authorised to teleport to sanctioned locations — you will not be sanctioned to teleport to locations where undesirable individuals are to be found. If you are deemed an undesirable individual you will not be authorised to teleport anywhere at all — restricted to whatever areas are deemed appropriate to one such as yourself.

Indeed, if you are deemed undesirable, you may well be allowed to step in at one end, only to find … or, rather, not … that the powers that be do not bother to reassemble you at the other end … keeping your pattern trapped in the waveform matrix for as long as they should deem appropriate — that is, of course, only assuming that they don’t simply decide to wipe your pattern from the matrix altogether … eliminating you once and for all.

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This is one occasion on which the Luddites will prove to have been right all along and, as soon as you hear about “teleportation for the masses”, it’s time to start buying wooden clogs … or their quantum mechanical equivalent … en masse!

Just say a resounding “NO!” to teleportation.