Déja Déja Vu

Read the below ‘story’: Appointment, Ointment, Schmointment

It’s not the last time I’ve had to deal with a situation that stupid — there have been (oh, so) many others since *sigh*

But I want you to be in the right frame of mind for what follows.

Done that?

Okay then …

A couple of days ago, I couldn’t log into my email.

Not only that but, when the reCAPTCHA was presented, for me to prove that I am not a ‘robot’, it was empty except for the word “blocked’.

Really?

The way to prove I am human is disallowed?

Talk about Kafkaesque.

So, I tried a different webbrowser (with different configuration).

Still no dice.

I tried another browser (again with a different configuration).

Nope.

A fourth … that just lets everything load, with no blockers or spoofers (for those occasions when I want to troubleshoot matters) … wasn’t the solution either.

So, I tried a different machine.

Running a different operating system.

And a further three browsers (two of them only installed on that machine).

I got no further there either.

I try logging into five different email accounts.

Same problem each time.

I have no trouble logging into any other account I have with any other service provider however.

Right, so, it’s not the browser, not the operating system, not the machine.

I try logging into my Google/Android account on my phone.

No problem.

I try logging into my Google/Android account using the Chrome browser … (Ack! Pppptttthhhhbbbbbt! Spit!) … just to be sure.

No problem there either.

So, it’s not my ISP.

Nor is it that Google are detecting ‘unusual activity’ from my IP address (or even range of addresses) and refusing to deliver the reCAPCHTA — otherwise I couldn’t have logged into my Google/Android account either.

It’s unique to my email provider.

I go to their support page and explain the issue.

Nothing changes all day.

I turn my router off for twenty-four hours, in the hope that it will be assigned a new P address — just in case, you know (I can’t think of anything that could be happening that would cause Google to block my computers but not my phones, but, hey).

The next day, when I try to log in, there is no reCAPTCHA challenge and I am able to log into my email without difficulty.

So, after 48 hours, I was finally able to read my email provider’s reply to my case explaining [stuff] (it was their fault) … and asking for an update (can I now log into my email?).

What!?

How do they imagine I will reply to it?

If I can’t log into my account then I won’t get the email, will I?

A five-year-old would see the flaw in their logic!

I reply explaining that,yes, I can now log into my email again, but that what is really required is a ticket system users can log into directly, so that they can receive replies and follow them up when there is a problem that prevents them from making use of their email.

I receive a reply explaining that I need an email account at which to receive replies from technical support.

*sigh*

I explain … once again … the flaw in the logic and recommend (again) that they implement a solution that doesn’t rely upon a Catch 22 — just like the ten-to-twenty other product/service providers with whom I have accounts for various purposes.

I receive a reply explaining that they have a ticketing system, but I need an email account at which to receive replies.

WHAT!?

Just … … WHAT!?

Quite apart from the fact that they either haven’t read my replies or else have reading comprehension issues … I know they have a ticketing system — just what do they think I contacted them on in the first place!?

Tell you what: next time you lock yourself out of your home … and your phone is locked in there along with your keys … don’t panic, just call a locksmith and they’ll unlock your door, so you can retrieve your phone and call a locksmith to let you into your home ¹.

I despair of the human race at times …. really I do.

Monkey Dust — Work Experience (Kelly) Pt 1
Monkey Dust — Work Experience (Kelly) Pt 2
Monkey Dust — Work Experience (Kelly) Pt 3


¹ Yes, I have lost my cool and am verging on outright sarcasm for once, rather than withering scorn — but I am mightily vexxed.

There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live and too rare to die.